Knock, Knock

Who's there?
It's me! Can you believe it!?!
I realize I've been phoning it in lately but I'm going to use the old tried-and-true school excuse.
Right now all my creative juices are being used to sound smart and witty in the classroom and there hasn't been any left over for this blog. So in honor of those juices that need to be reserved for academic purposes I am going to randomly write out the ideas swirling around in my noggin.
-Cable is the devil. Logic and I upgraded to the premium package and now have too much t.v. Between Orangutan Island, DIY, Sex in Independent Film (which was a little too graphic for my taste, actually), karaoke and even a yoga channel, I feel my soul depleting every time I hit the 'on' button.
-Vegas can't come soon enough; I haven't seen the sun in about 4 days now. February in the NW is a dirty bitch and I will be so glad to have a respite from it.
-It's amazing what a difference music makes during my work-outs. This morning I was struggling on the elliptical. I just wasn't feelin' it. But then (yeah, I'll admit it) Britney's "Break the Ice" came on and I was off and running. I get mesmerized by the beats and find my feet trying to stay in time.
-Every time I use a semi-colon ^(ex: "enough; I haven't") I hear Kurt Vonnegut in my head: "If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don’t have the nerve to be a homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts. But do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites, standing for absolutely nothing. All they do is show you’ve been to college."
-My mom buys me a calendar every year for my cube. This year's is Live With Intention and the quote for the month is: "At first glance I loved you with a thousand hearts". It makes me smile and miss her every time I see it.

Fun With Meditation

I had a talk with Jesus today.
I was lying on a cloud, minding my own business when he floated over. We talked awhile and he told me it was alright if I didn't want to believe that he was God. He said I could believe whatever I wanted. He also gave some great advice about what to do when times get tough. He said I should just let it go. And ride the wave.
Did I mention Jesus talked like a surfer?

Choosing a Path

My parents are driving to Amarillo today so that my dad can meet with a dietitian. When asked why, my dad replied by saying something about his age and how he wanted to make sure he was eating the right things to stay healthy. And while I applaud him for being proactive, I can't deny that the conversation freaked me out a little bit.
My parents are old. And not in the 'everybody says their parents are old' kind of way. While I am the tender age of 28, my mom is 65 and my dad is going to be 70 in April. Those are the breaks when you're the youngest of six children. (And I will forever be left knowing that my older siblings all spent more time with our parents than I ever will.)
I should count myself lucky because I enjoy spending time with my parents. I know my situation isn't exactly the norm. For one, my parents are still married. Over forty years of marital work, and they are still going strong. For another, they're great parents. And to sum up what could potentially be a very long list, they're pretty damn fun too. But all of those pros don't take away from one big con: we won't be growing into old age together.
After talking to my dad, my anxious mind went into a similar spiral to the one I just exhibited. I was saddened at the thought of my parents not remaining their spry selves. Of their embarrassment when the time comes for them to need help doing daily tasks. And the realistic potential of consoling one after the other one passes. But I quickly realized that I was leading myself down an unhealthy path. After all, the 'what ifs' are a token sign of anxiety. And once I start down that road, it gets harder and harder to turn around and rush back to safety.
So instead I chose to remind myself that this is a habit I'm trying to break. No one knows the future so there is no need to fret about it. The only thing worrying will do is lead me right down the path I'm trying to avoid.
So I took a deep breath and put a smile on my face. That's a good start.